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[Tidbits] The Unicorn


#1

I have an image of this magnificent looking piece of jewelry you see
… in the form of a Unicorn. Which clearly and immediately brings to
mind this pressing question: How does one tame a Unicorn? And the
answer is ladies and gennulmen … by the touch of a virgin. Ye gads,
folks. Who woulda thunk it?

There is this little bit of lore that might seem at first glance a
tad strange. There is also this old saw that states: Sanity … like
morality … is decided by the majority. I vote we add strangeness to
that saw. Sanity … like strangeness … like morality … yada yada
yada. So … to un-digress myself … the little bit of lore goes
like this: Only a virgin can tame a Unicorn … however … the virgin
must be a boy in disguise. Hunh?

I dash with alacrity over to my unabridged library edition of the
Random Dictionary of the English Language and look up the word:
Virgin. A girl, it says. A woman, it says. A female, it says. It’s an
old old dictionary. I suspect it’s wrong. Can a male not be a virgin
… I ask you each and every one? And so again … to un-digress once
more … I return to my fabled beastie.

There is this fellow by the name of Lawrence Kallenberg who is
clearly talented beyond talented and who wrote a book about jewelry
modeling in wax. I tend–beyond reason–to admire extraordinary
work. This guy is amazing. Wait. You will all soon see his Unicorn.

Did you know that a Unicorn’s horn has the unique ability to purify
poisoned water? Yes yes it does. How many of you use a filter to
purify the water zillions of others in past generations were able to
drink on a daily basis without falling deathly ill. No matter. The
filter is inefficient. Get yourselves a pet Unicorn … dip his horn
into that thousand gallon vat of water you all hold in reserve lest
you should get thirsty … and presto gasatz … the water is a pure
as … as … as that virgin mentioned above.

There is a ton of available about the Unicorn … not
the least of which is that there are–according to Aristotle–two
kinds. The Antelope Unicorn … and the Ass Unicorn. Hey … if Ari
says it … then it’s got to be true. Yes? But I won’t bore you with
more details. One can absorb just so much trivia before one’s gills
get bloated. And so …

For those of you who are new to this thing called Tidbits…may I
direct you to my home page at www.tyler-adam.com where you will
scroll down the left side menu till you get to the area that says
Tidbits Graphics … and then click on the link that says: Uni …
where you’ll see an image of a silver and vermeil Unicorn by
Lawrence Kallenberg.

And there ya have it.
That’s it for this week folks.
Catch you all next week.
Benjamin Mark