This year at a show which draws families I took the chance of having
"kids" grades 1 to 12 torch-fire a piece of copper that they could
wear after seeing other demonstrators have “kids” do something such
as solder a copper ring. I was simply awed by the kid s who wanted
to do this. To begin they were extremely focused and very well
behaved. They did exactly what I asked them to do. For the little
ones I helped them hold the torch or apply the enamel. One kid, grade
3, had near perfect motor skills, perfect lines of enamel laid down
on the copper. I mentioned this to his mum who replied that his
teacher said that he had poor motor skills. Could it have been that
motivation as the variable" When talking about our experiences with
them we came to the conclusion that for some it could have been
life-altering. No science to prove it, but it appeared that for the
first time some of them had complete control over the outcome of
their vision and a ctivity. All were really proud of what they had
done.
Karen, you really make me wish I lived closer to your fantastic
school!? I immediately related to your comment about “art school”.?
Sometimes that feels very lonely, and it’s much worse if you have a
hard time finding an audience for your work! 
I’ve been reading this thread with interest, and I guess I’ve just
instinctively learned how to deal with the kids throughout the
course of selling at shows.? Very early on a toddler wandered into
my booth while her “adult in charge” (she wasn’t with her mother)
stood outside my booth talking to a friend and was not paying
attention.? I was a bit busy and didn’t notice till the toddler
dropped one of my glass beads on the cement and broke it.? I made
the lady pay for it.? Her friend came back later to tell me I ripped
her friend off.? Sigh.? I’ve gotten pretty good at heading off
sticky fingers or?kids from just grabbing stuff by joking about how
mad their parents get when I make them pay for stuff.??I do always?
try to compliment parents on well behaved children and even the well
behaved children themselves.? Parenting is?a hard and very thankless
job.? Those who get it right should be told so, especially in
earshot of those with “terrors”!
Kerry
www.celtcraftjewelry.com
My strategy with children is to show them how I make my crocheted
beads. I give them an unfinished one to touch and feel or maul,if
they need that lesson, I can fix it easily. And talk about how the
beads are made, and that they are special and very unusual. And how
special it is to have something hand made!
I tell them what I told my children when they were growing up, you
may touch anything you want, but with only one finger. (Point your
index finger at this point) This keeps the positive energy going in
the booth (none of the no no no stuff) and the parents seem
relieved. Also, THIS the next generation of fine craft collectors. I
want the kids to know that there is something really pretty special
about hand made presents. I also make baby bracelets and take
commissions for small children’s too, and you would be surprised
with the sales that I do make because the parents are so relieved.
(I was a kindergarden teacher in a past live :>)
My 2 cents
Joan
I love this ideal ! I know my husband is big on the kids when we do
shows, he will sit up all night and make little cheap necklaces that
he hands out to every child he sees. It keeps him and the kids busy
while the adults and I do business 
He tells me he is training
them to like and want to buy our jewelry – like you said future
customers in the making ! And I admit, it seems to work, we have the
same people coming by each year, the kids to see what Kelly has for
them and the adults to see what is new on the tables !
Take care, Tina
Karen,
I wholeheartedly agree. As a parent, I see it as my job to take
responsibility for my children. They have always been taught to
respect their own and other people’s possessions/property and have
always been well behaved when in public. They have always been
complimented on their good and polite behaviour. I didn’t find it
difficult to bring up my children with manners but there are so many
parents out there who simply seem to have given up and let their
children run amock.
I am NOT anti-children (having four myself) but I think it does them
more favours to bring them up to be good citizens rather than let
them misbehave and grow up with no manners. There are times and
places for them to be inquisitive and touchy-feely and man-handling
someone’s fine jewellery or art that has taken them many hours of
hard work is not one of them.
I apologise to anyone who finds this attitude a little harsh, I
don’t want to offend anyone.
Helen Hill
At several of the shows I do, I spend a lot of time sitting at a
small work table either piercing or doing wax work. It draws kids
like a magnet, and I can tell them about what I’m doing, let them
feel the saw teeth or explain how a ring goes from wax to metal.
Parents are interested too, and they look at my work with a greater
appreciation of what goes into it.
Janet Kofoed
http://users.rcn.com/kkofoed
Helen,
I didn't find it difficult to bring up my children with manners but there are so many parents out there who simply seem to have given up and let their children run amock.
I am continually bewildered by the “It Takes a Village - So Let Them
Handle It” parenting methodology which seems distressingly prevalent.
On several occasions, I’ve had children whose ages are still
expressed in “months” pulled out of their protective, secure
strollers and plunked down on top of non-tempered glass counters -
which they proceed to kick - within grabbing range of adults-only
jewelry. I’ve had customers show up for studio appointments with
babies and very small children without benefit of prior warning or
request - no opportunity to explain why that’s not advisable so
please, let’s reschedule (no alternative activities more interesting
than my studio and their mommy, apparently, though I’ve tried;
inordinately friendly and sociable kitties - which Precious is either
afraid of or tries to abuse; lots of breakables, etc. - a space not
at all childproofed. I don’t have insurance for this…!) One woman
showed up with both her baby and her sullen, impatient mother-in-law.
Grandma finally, grudgingly, took baby out on my balcony when he
began to fuss, whereupon she blandly watched him rip out every single
flowering plant within reach.
On the other hand, I have been known to invite clients to bring
their older children to the studio, those who are old enough to be
excited and interested in, and hopefully subtly educated by, all the
cool stuff I can show them along with Mom, or even teach them some
techniques if they’re interested.
And while I’m ranting, let me mention my limited patience with
people bringing too-young children to adult, evening concerts as
well, allowing them to run, shrieking, up and down the aisles during
the performance.
I was hardly a 24/7 angel, but if my siblings or I had behaved like
this, especially in public, with strangers, my mother would have seen
to it that we never survived to adulthood with all our digits intact.
margery
Hello,
No, expecting children to have a “hands-off” attitude towards
other’s belongings and fine art isn’t a harsh attitude at all. It is
entirely reasonable to expect parents and children to be properly
trained to behave appropriately in a fine art or other public
settings.
I think it’s fair to ask parents who don’t control their children to
leave your booth. My thinking is that shoppers who don’t control
their children may not appreciate the discipline and skill required
in your jewelery, because they don’t seem to apply these subjects in
their own lives, or to their children. Besides, I would think that
out-of-control children would be a major turnoff to serious buyers.
On the other hand, I may very well be talking through my hat.
When I do trunk shows, I try to keep large-ish rocks/rough for
children to look at and handle. Sometimes I give them the rock, and
sometimes I have to let them have it -so obviously, this isn’t
pricey stuff I’m distracting the kids with!
At home, my kids have their own “tool box” with scrapped copper
jewelry I made years ago to play with. It keeps them occupied.
Either way, some sort of discipline/control is important -I can
still feel my mother’s hand on the back of my neck whenever I go to
a jewelry show!
Hope I haven’t been too long-winded,
Susannah Page-Garcia
A junior at the University of Texas majoring in Accounting-Pre Law.
Dear Margery,
I’m happy to see that it’s not just me who thinks children should be
taught good behaviour and manners. I’m NOT saying that they should be
ignored or not allowed to go out in public, just that from a young
age they should be taught how to behave in public.
I think it’s wonderful that some artists encourage children to learn
and take part and that is a positive way to engage them but parents
who let their little “angels” run riot while they are shopping
infuriates me immensely.
I was brought up very religious and as such had to sit in church two
or three times a week, for at least an hour at a time and not make a
sound apart from singing hymns and saying amen at the end of prayers.
My children also had the same upbringing and as such they are capable
of good behaviour and being quiet when it matters. I’m also NOT
saying that every child should go to church to learn manners. I do,
however, believe that every child has the ability to learn good
behaviour.
Since joining this wonderful forum, I have visited websites where
they are stated and have admired everyone’s lovely work and feel
that such lovely creations made with high quality precious metals and
gems should be treated with a high level of respect. All those hours
of fabrication and polishing, I know if it was me witnessing children
handling things I’d made with sticky chocolate fingers, I would be
in despair.
I also second your comments about children running and shrieking up
and down the aisles at concerts. In my humble opinion, today’s
children (oh I do sound old!) are over-stimulated such that when
there is no visual, noise, or touchy-feely stimulation available
they can’t cope and cause havoc. It saddens me to see the appalling
state of behaviour and short attention spans in some children today
(particularly here in the UK) and I speak as a former high school
teacher so I’ve seen a lot of it.
I hope I don’t seem like a horrible, opinionated person - I’m just
sharing my experiences and thoughts.
Helen
Here is my make lemonade out of lemons approach to kids, nagging
partners, or impatient friends.
My philosophy is if you can keep the significant other happy, the
real shopper will stay longer in your booth and buy. If you noticed,
the “smart” stores have a couch and magazines for the husband or a
play area for the kids because there is no way anyone can concentrate
with someone distracting them with bad behavior, nagging, or someone
pestering them to move on.
Obviously, at a show you do not have the space for this option, so I
like to get the significant other involved. For me the gift to gab
works well.
For the kids that are little (out of the choking stage) I’ll give
them a bead, sometimes a cheap freshwater pearl or something
inexpensive. The parent is amazed at this perceived value of this
gift and the kid feels special because you made them feel special. –
sometimes a quick fantasy story about the bead helps, but all in all
they just wanted attention and you just gave it to them.
For the uninvolved husband. He has been pretty much ignored all day.
Sometimes just acknowledging his pain brings a smile. I tease all
the husbands and call them the “Faithful Bag Holder” (he is the one
that trails behind a couple steps with the plastic bag with the event
logo on it), that always gets a chuckle. After you get him talking,
then use him to your advantage and get him involved in the sale by
pointing out stuff he thinks his wife will like. Believe it or not
kids like to help with this too and you would be surprised that in
many cases the family member knows their taste.
Ok, I know this won’t always work, but if you can turn a negative
situation around, it can be a benefit for everyone.
Holly
Gage Designs
I’ve been side-tracked with minor surgery, shows, and volunteer work
at the art museum at which my husband serves as executive director,
so I’m only just catchin’ up with daily digest emails.
Thank you to all who offered their personal fix for curious,
gotta-touch-it, children. While I totally agree with all the
responses relating more to parental responsibilities which seem to
fall by the wayside in these circumstances, these posts weren’t as
useful to me as some of the great ideas for keeping kids occupied so
that a parent can shop. Though I can truly understand the need to
vent! : )
My absolute favorite, laugh-out-loud (offline) suggestion was “How
about some pretty colored rat & mouse traps?” An unnecessary “just
kidding!!” was added at the tail end, but I’m sure the sender was
right in thinking “I don’t dare post this”. Still, come on, ya gotta
giggle. The Treasure Chest idea was intriguing, and I’ve found myself
looking for a suitable “chest”. After a more recent post about a
husband who makes bracelets to give away, the lightbulb came on for a
use for the cool (but kinda ugly) photosensitive beads I got long ago
from Edmund Scientific (they’re about a 12mm opague white rondelle
that come alive with color when put out in sunlight). Also, I began
this show adventure with three 2’x4" tables that have three heights,
the tallest being the height at which I display. I cannot raise them
any higher, or it’ll be too high even for adults. I also appreciated
the encouragement to Speak Up under these circumstances; and I guess
I may just have to practice that while I move on the treasure
chest/bracelet ideas. Still… some great material… many of which I
copied and pasted into a Word document to print, punch and file in
my “Ganoksin Binder”.
And I see that my “Kid Dilemma” has morphed into “Comments from
Adults at Shows”, from which I have also suffered. Loved the stab,
stab, stab in response to “what a lovely hobby…” I’ve also been
hit with “what do you do when you’re not making jewelry?” How 'bout
keeping up with laundry, cleaning my house, walking the dog and
trashing the weed weasels in my gardens for a start?!?!?
You guys are the best… thanks again!
Apologies in advance for resurrecting this thread but I had a
situation today at a show that still has me shaking my head.
I was busy with a customer with a sale and didn’t notice their
arrival but when I had finished with the customer I looked over and
there sat a stroller pushed up against my table with a 2-3 year old
girl in it and her 4-5 year old sister standing busily manhandling
my jewelry. No parent in sight. I assumed that the parent was in the
next booth and would soon be right there. A few minutes ticked by
and the manhandling continued until she came across a Cobaltoan
Calcite piece. OK, I’m a parent. I’m even a grandparent and can
tolerate a lot from kids but this was pushing my buttons. So I
politely told the little girl that these pieces were very expensive
(a relative term given my price points are from $20-$500). Still no
parent. She then proceeded to try rings on her sister in the
stroller. At that point I asked in a loud voice (my normal speaking
tone because my voice carries for miles), “Where are your parents?”
Eventually a woman showed up who was one booth over by the looks of
her purchase. She asked if the nice man was teaching them about the
pretty rocks. I guess the look on my face was not to welcoming so she
offered the excuse that it was the only shady spot. I purposely set
my tables back a couple of feet from the front and have an awning on
my tent so that customers can shop in the shade. I responded, “Shade
is for customers.”
She must have just remembered that she had an important appointment
because she left in an awful rush…
Rick Copeland
Silversmith and Lapidary Artisan
Rocky Mountain Wonders
Colorado Springs, Colorado
http://rockymountainwonders.com