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Request for off-line help on ISP's [yak]

I know this is off topic, but I have very few local friends on the
net and need some help. My ISP tells me my problems are due to:
my Compaq Presario; my Compaq modem; my Microsoft software; my
mail reader; my news reader; or anything, it seems, other than
their responsibility. I guess they don’t ‘like’ any of my stuff.
I get timeouts in email, connecting to sites, and lots of other
problems. My modem transmits at 31,200 bps and I have 30mg ram.
If anyone is willing and has the time, please contact me off-line.
I need help and probably a new ISP!

Bacliff, Texas Gulf Coast USA