Helen, Your posts are right on. Dont let one out of thousands ruin
your day.
Richard
To Karen Trimble Shell,
It was a pleasure to be able to help out and thanks for your
support.
To Terrie Masters,
Thank you for your lovely words, and for the help youve given me
over the years since Ive been a member of Orchid.
To James Binnion,
Thank you very much. Its quite something to have my contributions
appreciated by one of the groups gurus! I always enjoy your posts
too.
To Don in SOFL,
Thanks for helping to put this little incident into perspective and
for your words of encouragement.
To Richard Hart,
Thank you too for your kind words.
To JeffD,
Thank you for your lovely words. I will work on my verbosity and
appreciate you pointing it out in such a nice way - thats what
constructive criticism is all about - pointing out something
negative in a positive way (see other thread). 
To Gary W Bourbonais,
Good point about deleting posts which one finds irritating. I do it
myself. I think most of us delete topics/posters were not interested
in reading and read topics/posters we are interested in.
To Janice,
Yes, we have indeed corresponded offlist. I enjoy doing so with many
Orchid members and hope to continue to do so for many years to come.
Thanks to everybody both off and on-list who has emailed me with
kind words. It is very much appreciated.
Helen
http://www.hillsgems.co.uk
http://helensgems.ganoksin.com/blogs/
helen,
since you arrived at Orchid as a total novice jeweler, but
experienced chemist, you have made valuable contributions…
sometimes responses require more than a few sentences- not many have
the luxury of time to spend in delivering whatever perspective they
have on X issue or question. Novices should be thankful to have you
among all the other regular participants that will take the time to
thoroughly answer a question, or submit a subjective
point-of-view…and it does take time. You have made great progress in
self-teaching since arriving at Orchid which is testament to the
value of this site and the regular contributors that continue to
respond. Don’t let the [] among the crowd get you down- they exist,
and unfortunately won’t go away- just realize that your
contributions are of far greater value than anything they cowardly
write you offlist…if they don’t dare say it to the group they don’t
dare risk exposing themselves, in turn you are, in a sense protected
by that comraderie and open exchange of ideas and knowledge that
Orchid is intended to provide. It is a valuable service to those that
sincerely want to learn…personalities shouldn’t be a part of Orchid
at all, nor should personal attacks. We have both been here long
enough to see group attacks happen when someone posts the ridiculous
or simply incorrect- then it goes away… All of us that contribute
to Orchid have distinct styles of writing, and imply one’s
knowledgeability in their contributions… that is what remains…not
those posters that come and go, and learn nothing in being here. You
continue learning, as the art and science of jewellery making is what
is of substance and why we are here. Those that think they know it
all will never progress. Ars longa vita brevis… rer
Hello Helen,
I sympathize. Just consider the email as “junk” and let it go. Our
forum has observed your posts since you began and I admire your
"gumption." You’ve made amazing progress with your abilities and
skills - especially considering that you did not have the benefit of
a teacher!! I think you personify the word, “persistence.”
Let the petty criticism just roll off and continue to share your
questions, discoveries, and knowledge. Orchid rocks because of
people like you,
Judy in Kansas, who did an outdoor show on the Fourth - perfect
weather, but not many sales!
I would advise this person, if they find your posts irritating, to simply delete them.... No need to get nasty....
A representative quote… I had some correspondence with Helen, and
she sent me some of the quotes from the posting she had gotten as
part of it. Just FYI - calling it “inappropriate” is beyond tame. If
they had written it to the President, the Secret Service would have
gone calling on the writer. It was hate mail, plain and simple. Just
thought I’d let everyone know that it’s not a matter of Helen being
sensitive. There were some other thoughts and discussions from other
people, too, but it’s not my place to share those. No need to belabor
the thing, but just FYI.
Dear Helen - I’ve only recently kicked up my “smithing” a notch &
look forward to your posts - I learn something every time! Please
don’t let the twits & dolts keep you from posting. As others have
said - if s/he doesn’t like your post - there is a delete button &
it really, really works! Keep on sharing your knowledge
& caring. I, for one, truly appreciate it!
For what it’s worth-
I have found Orchid to be one of the most flame-free environments of
all the forums I have experienced. Naturally there is the odd duck
in any group - maybe someone having a bad day - but compared to other
forums on various topics, this is one of the very best. Even when
disagreements crop up I have seen very little in the way of personal
attacks. I’m sorry for Helen’s bad experience but I don’t se it as a
pervasive problem in this group. Thanks to our hard-working
moderator. I feel a great deal of tolerance, patience, willingness
to continue discussions until a point of understanding might be
reached - pretty damn good for such a diverse group; amateurs,
professionals, people from all nations… damn good!
Marty
Without knowing what was said, shouldn’t we assume that we should be
able to disagree with each other and criticize? I mean if all we
hear are the positive and up lifting comments, doesn’t that give a
false sense of security. I feel it’s how we handle being criticized
that truly makes us all grow. Now don’t get me wrong. It sounds like
it was pretty harsh from what I’ve read, but that’s still only 1 side
of the matter. I fear that what I see happening is that if there is a
comment made, however harsh or negative, a “gang up” list of
comments starts.
We all know what wonderful contribution’s Helen has made to this
site, but maybe we shouldn’t be so defensive and so quick to nail
the other side to the wall. It may lead to holding back TRUE feelings
or comments. Kind of like the story of the Emperor’s New Clothes!
Remember the ridicule of the 1 person that spoke out?
To Pete, Mike DeBurgh, Stacy Hosler, Pam Chott, Richard and Rose
Langbert, R.E. Rourke, Judy Willingham, Sue Hillard,
Thank you all SO much for the truly supportive emails you’ve sent
me. You’ve all really helped to put this unfortunate incident into
perspective. I really appreciate everything that everybody has said.
I apologise for not emailing you all separately, sending combined
responses instead. I’ve been really pushed for time and haven’t had
the time to even read Orchid for a few days, but I’ve tried to keep
on top of the responses to this thread.
I am, however, stuck in hospital today having a routine (once
yearly) hydrocortisone day curve. This involves arriving at the
hospital at breakfast time, having a blood test, taking my first dose
of HC, then another blood test an hour later. Then follows five hours
of complete boredom followed by another blood test, meds, blood test
at lunch time. Then another four or so hours of boredom, ending in
blood test, meds, blood test at the end of the day. So, for a change
I have lots of time on my hands today, so I downloaded my Orchid
emails this morning and brought my laptop with me - but I am limited
this time by battery power rather than time! I’m replying to as many
as I can whilst my battery lasts and will then have to upload my
responses when I get home later. I’ve also brought the latest copy of
Jewelry Artist which arrived on my doorstep yesterday and a novel, so
I should have plenty to keep me busy, or at least alleviate the
boredom.
Helen
UK
http://www.hillsgems.co.uk
http://helensgems.ganoksin.com/blogs/
Hi Helen,
I’ve been out of town the last few days so I missed the beginning of
this thread. I’m so sorry that you had such an unfortunate
experience. I think the email you received probably says a lot more
about the individual that sent it than anything you should be
concerned with. The responses you received demonstrate what a
wonderful place Orchid is, and that it is frequented by many, many
wonderful people. The fact that the email in question would have
been edited out and would never have seen the light of day on Orchid
is a further demonstration of the wonder that is Orchid. Thank you
Hanuman et al for the great job you do in keeping the discourse
civil. Thank you also for allowing us to have addresses for our
fellow Orchidians. It has been a really great experience to be able
to have outside conversations, and I’m very grateful for the
opportunity.
In my opinion the real damage done by this episode is to the lurkers
that are afraid to post out of fear of receiving this very treatment.
It takes guts to put it out on the line and tell the world of your
inexperience and need of help, or to open yourself up to criticism of
how you do things when offering advice. You are to be commended for
your courage Helen, both in your admission of your inexperience and
then in your passing on of what you have learned. It has been a lot
of fun for me to watch your growth and the positive influence the
Orchid community has had on your work. I have learned a great deal
from your questions and the answers you received as well as the posts
you have made that reflect your knowledge, not only about jewelry but
about many other topics as well.
I sincerely hope that this incident will not deter you from posting
in the future and I really hope it doesn’t stop others from joining
in the back and forth conversation that defines Orchid and it’s great
contributors.
My Dad used to tell me that the best way to deal with a bully is to
ignore them and deny them the pleasure of knowing that they got to
you. This person is nothing more than a playground bully and deserves
nothing more than to be ignored. Please keep posting. And to all the
lurkers out there, please don’t let this stop you from making that
first post. The vast majority of people that frequent Orchid and the
Ganoksin Project are friends that we just haven’t met yet, as Will
Rogers once put it.
Dave
if they don't dare say it to the group they don't dare risk exposing themselves,
Hanuman does a wonderful job of moderating this forum, and nothing
that would be that hurtful would be permitted to be posted to the
group. That’s a lot of work for a group this active, and I, for one,
really appreciate the effort that goes in to that.
Helen, you keep right on posting. I’ve valued your questions AND
your answers, even if I don’t have a whole lot to say about either,
and it’s quite obvious that I’m not the only one, not by a long shot.
And I’m glad you brought this up… even if the “bully” isn’t
“outed”, that person is hearing that we don’t play that game here.
Helen-
I learned something new today thanks to your post: HC day curve. As
soon as I read your message, I googled having never heard the term
before. Fascinating albeit boring for you.
I trust that you are now finished with the test until next year and
feeling chipper. I so enjoy your e-mails.
Marly
We all know what wonderful contribution's Helen has made to this site, but maybe we shouldn't be so defensive and so quick to nail the other side to the wall.
Reading between the lines, I am quite sure if “we” knew the actual
content Helen received, it would be apparent that the behavior of
the other side was, as the title states, Inappropriate emails. So
actually, you are suggesting that the “other side” be supported for
unacceptable behavior. I question why the person emailing Helen did
not post on the forum…
Apparently Helen received an email that was literally abusive
language, and there is no excuse for that. Period.
Richard Hart G.G.
Denver, Co.
Helen,
Sorry I didn’t reply sooner. You keep posting. I enjoy your emails
and I. for one, ignore bullies.
I belong to another forum of retired police officers, and some of
those guys can really be abrasive. I just hit delete and don’t give
them the satisfaction of knowing they upset or riled me.
Good luck with your test!
Francesca
I agree that abusive lang. should not be tolerated, but I get a lot
of instruction and from this site, and maybe, just maybe
“we” shouldn’t use this forum to air our dirty laundry. Let’s
continue to educate and share ideas. I don’t feel that this is the
appropriate place for ANY of this. Let’s all agree that Helen is a
great asset to this forum and we don’t want to loose her. Also let’s
move on and keep this kind of stuff on the other sites appropriate
for that subject matter. Ignore the harsh comments and move on.
That’s all I was trying to get across.
Steve Cowan
www.aristadesigns.net