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[Tidbits] Starfish


Not a creature to make man jump for joy… for the starfish is in
direct competition with the fisherman as they both love to eat
mussels. Alas for the fisherman… the starfish has a bit of an edge.
Actually… it has a few bits of a few edges.

Edge number one: When Mr. Starfish and Ms. Starfish–one can never be
too politically correct–when they meet… they make little wee ones
in much the same manner that we make our little wee ones. They do the
wild mambo. However… since we humans despise competition and would
very much like to eradicate off the face of the earth any creature
that has the temerity to eat the same food we do… or even inhabit
the same land we do… we tend to try to destroy that creature as
rapidly as is possible. In the case of the starfish… when fishermen
catch them in their nets… they chop them up into bitty pieces and
toss them back into the briny for the local predators to gobble up.
Ah… but here’s the rub. Each little chopped up piece… as long as
there’s enough of it… grows back into a whole new starfish. Asexual
reproduction… thou art not dead.

Edge number two: The starfish is really a man. Now this may be a tad
farfetched for the doubting minds of those who are naively
scientifically inclined. But there is a lad out there who once wrote
a tale about a seagull who was in the business of making people…
and whose early attempts were rather dismal. His first attempt… and
I shall not now go into the reasoning behind this attempt for it is
rather complex and trying to the untrained mind… but his first
attempt ended up having five appendages instead of four… and its
stomach ended up in the middle of its body and its head I believe
was just above that. Being a ridiculous looking thing and a poor
substitute for a man… the seagull dropped it into the sea and began

As to why the starfish is flat… well… it once tried–with a few
compatriots–to steal a canoe from a whale. The whale did not take
kindly to having his possessions snatched from under his fluke… so
he gave the starfish one mighty smack and flattened him into the
pancake appearance he and his descendants now carry.

As to how big a starfish really is… well… I have the answer to
that too. Is there no end to the lore that lies deep within my lore-
ish breast… I ask you? The largest starfish was collected in 1968
and measured 54.33 inches across. The smallest starfish–on the
other hand–does not exceed 0.78 inches. And as far as how deep can a
starfish live… the answer is: 24,881 feet.

And now for the biggest question of them all. Benjamin! What has
this to do with jewelry? Hmmm? Well I’ll tell ya. There was once this
artist type fellow by the name of Salvador Dali who made a little
ruby and diamond doo-dad called the “Ctoile de Mer”. Quite a
little brooch if your tastes lean toward magnificent. Wanna see it?

For those of you who are new to this thing called Tidbits…may I
direct you to my home page at where you will
scroll down the left side menu till you get to the area that says
Current Tidbits… and then click on it in order to view an image of
Dali’s Ctoile de Mer worth around $70,000.

And there ya have it.
That’s it for this week folks.
Catch you all next week.
Benjamin Mark